over personal advancement took
precedence and she decided to
complete two years in the military
prior to pursuing academic studies.
There will undoubtedly be those
who read this, thinking Nurit’s
philosophy simplistic, idealistic
and no way to get ahead. But in this
particular instance, Nurit’s ethos led
to her meeting the man who would
become her husband. Toward the
end of her two-year military service,
while walking with a friend uphill
from the beach to her parents’ home
on Mount Carmel in Haifa, a young
medical student stopped his car
to offer the pair a ride. Normally,
Nurit would have taken the bus,
but it was Roshashana and there
was no bus service on the holiday.
The student, Ilan, later called
Nurit to see if she were free that
evening. Coincidentally, Nurit did
have plans with an architect who
happened to be a friend of Ilan’s,
but she assured him it was purely
platonic. Ilan chivalrously agreed to
serve as chauffeur that evening for
Nurit, her date, her girlfriend and
her girlfriend’s date.
Though Ilan was six years her
senior, Nurit was taken by his quoting
of poetry—he quoted a romantic
poem on his initial call—by his
sophistication and by the ways he
courted her. As Nurit’s time in the
military neared its end, Ilan suggested
they get married and move together
to Jerusalem where both will be
students at Hebrew University. The
19-year-old entered university a
married woman, living in a rented
room with her 25-year-old fourthyear
medical student husband.
Four years later, they had their
first child, Ron. He was a mere
three when his parents first came
to the U.S. in 1968, living in The
Bronx while Ilan trained at Albert
Einstein/Jacobi hospitals. With
little financially, but a wealth of
love and determination, the family
trio returned in 1972, moving
to Jericho, Long Island, but not
before blossoming into a quartet
with the arrival of daughter Millet
in 1971. Ilan finished his residency
in Long Island, where he set up a
solo practice as a OB/GYN.
Once the children were settled,
Nurit wasted little time in continuing
her own educational pursuits,
applying to Columbia… and only
Columbia, naive to the general
wisdom of vying for several universities
in case the number-one
choice falls through. Fortunately,
she was accepted on a work-study
program, sometimes commuting to
Columbia (from Jericho) twice a day,
to fulfill her university obligations.
She graduated with a Doctorate in
Psychology. “My dissertation was
on love—What else? When my
father read the dedication, which
says, among the rest, ‘to my parents,
who first showed me what love is
all about,’ he cried.”
Nurit opened a private practice
in Jericho, filling her days seeing
patients, directing a Child and
Family Therapy department in a
large clinic, developing and directing
psychology training programs,
and teaching—upwards of 70 weekly
hours. Along the way, she completed
a postgraduate three-year
training program at the Ackerman
Institute for Family Therapy in
NYC. “Teaching is my passion.
There are experiential components
in the teaching of psychology. In
order to be a psychologist, you have
to know yourself.”
Nurit doesn’t limit her approach
to any one paradigm of psychology.
Rather, she believes in dovetailing
treatment plans to the unique
needs of each patient. Even today,
though “retired,” she continues
to see patients. “I love being a
psychologist. I love the intimate
connection, the privilege of helping
people overcome their challenges
and live fuller, richer lives. It is an
honor to do this work.”
Despite the darkness of wars and
losses, or perhaps in defiance of it,
Nurit considers her growing-up
years a wonderful time. Among
Nurit’s passions are traveling (her
World Push Pin Travel Map shows
adventures around the world),
dance, art, literature and writing;
poetry, in particular. She was only
7-years-old, when she won the city’s
annual poetry contest in Haifa, and
she often shared her love of the
form, reading poetry at parties as
she grew. She continued to write
throughout her life and found the
transition from Hebrew to English,
capturing the lyrical quality of her
work in another language, quite
challenging. The rigors of university,
teaching and her own practice,
while raising two children, may
have curtailed her output, but
Nurit continued to write in what
few moments of free time she had in
her busy schedule. Since retirement,
Nurit’s become more prolific.
Daughter Millet, like her mom
followed a career path in psychology…
at least initially. As a Princeton
undergrad, she majored in the
subject, but subsequently changed
directions, entering Harvard Law
School and eventually becoming
a corporate attorney, overseeing
mergers and acquisitions. But her
heart was not into it and she’s since
devoted her life to Social Work as
a Loss and Grief Therapist.
In March 2014, Millet alerted
her mom about “A Call for Haiku
about NYC,” sponsored by the New
York Times to celebrate National
Poetry Month. Both submitted several
haiku for consideration. In ten
days, the paper received more than
2800 entries, out of which several
of Millet’s and two of Nurit’s were
among those chosen by a panel of
judges for publication in the New
York Times. Of the more than 250
of the favorites sent to New York
State Poet Laureate Marie Howe,
only six were selected and featured
as “Poet’s Picks.” One of these was
Nurit’s.
Not long after, an editor of the
New York Times contacted Nurit
about permission to include her
poems in a planned collection to
be released in 2017 by prestigious
book publisher, Rizzoli (Several
of daughter Millet’s were chosen
as well). “I found it in Barnes and
Noble even before the New York
Times sent me my copies!”
This prompted Nurit to submit to
other poetry contests and literary
magazines. In 2016, her work took
3rd place in the Nassau County
Poet Laureate Society Challenge,
2nd place in 2017. She’s also
won “Writer’s Digest” writing
challenges and been published in
the Poet Laureate Society Review
books, as well as an International
Peace anthology and international
anthology, “Beyond the Dark
Room,” for which she additionally
penned the foreword.
Like his dad, son Ron dedicated
his life to helping others in the medical
field, becoming a reconstructive
surgeon primarily for breast cancer
patients. It is sadly ironic, his skills
would be needed on his mother,
when she, too, developed breast
cancer in 2005, belying her father’s
superstitious belief in choosing her
name to protect her from the dreaded
disease which took his mother’s
life. The harrowing experience had
a profound effect on Nurit, as she
looked out her hospital window
during treatments at people conducting
their lives as usual. “I swore
to myself, ‘if I get out of this, I’ll
try never to sweat the small stuff.’”
Her cancer returned three years
later in 2008, but she has been
thankfully cancer-free the past ten
years.
For 42 years, Nurit and Ilan lived
in Jericho, before moving to North
Shore Towers in 2017. “Beyond the
beautiful apartment and the captivating
views, I wanted a place
that offered all the amenities and
activities offered here. Now that we
have lived here for almost I year, I
am also inspired by the people I
meet who, regardless of age, can
live meaningful lives in the place
they call home. I love walking in the
arcade and seeing people smiling
and greeting each other. The sense
of community which this place
offers is special.”
One of my absolute favorites In-Sea Meditation. I have searched the world
for seas that fit.
Bubbles with grandchildren
August 2018 ¢ NORTH SHORE TOWERS COURIER 17