40 THE QUEENS COURIER • WELLNESS • FEBRUARY 21, 2019 FOR BREAKING NEWS VISIT WWW.QNS.COM
wellness
Helpful advice for couples in search
of intimacy after prostate cancer
A prostate cancer diagnosis can lead
to profound changes in a man’s relationship
with his partner. As the most common
non-skin, male-specifi c cancer in the
U.S., prostate cancer aff ects one in nine
men. Approximately 165,000 men will be
diagnosed with prostate cancer this year
and 29,000 men will die from the disease.
While early detection and treatment can
save lives, treatment side eff ects can have a
negative impact on quality of life.
Th e prostate gland is part of the male
reproductive system. Th erefore, treatment
side eff ects can include erectile dysfunction
and incontinence, which can be temporary
or ongoing. Th ese side eff ects can
take a toll on sexual health and intimacy:
in fact, sexual dysfunction is oft en identifi
ed as the most common long-term side
eff ect aft er prostate cancer treatments like
surgery or radiation.
“We don’t always recognize and talk
about the ways that prostate cancer is also
a couple’s disease,” says Dr. Anne Katz, a
renowned author and clinical nurse specialist
who has devoted her career to helping
men and their partners work through
intimacy issues. “When prostate cancer
treatment aff ects a man’s ability to perform
sexually, that eliminates what is a
very important expression of love for
his partner. Th at can have an emotional
impact on the man and his partner. We
oft en see that leading to a downward spiral
of distance and withdrawal.”
Find common ground
Address these challenges by talking
openly about one’s sexual needs while
being respectful of the other partner.
Acknowledge that this conversation may
be uncomfortable. It may feel a bit like
threading a needle ... while wearing oven
mitts. Neither wants to appear selfi sh.
Neither wants to upset the other during
an already stressful time. And, for many
couples, discussing these deeply personal
issues in open conversation feels awkward.
Th e natural thing to do is to avoid
talking about it rather than risk the embarrassment
of a possible rejection.
Recognize that communication is the
best way for any couple to address their
issues about intimacy. Enter the conversation
with the mindset that you and your
partner can support each other and fi nd
common ground. Hold the conversation
in a neutral area - away from the bedroom
- without distractions or interruptions.
Above all, listen and empathize.
Know that options are out there
Most couples do not realize that there
may be possible solutions to restoring sexual
function aft er prostate cancer treatment.
From pills, to external devises,
injections and surgical procedures, there
are solutions for nearly everyone. With
persistence, a little humor, open discussion,
and medical support, couples may
reclaim sexual function once again.
Seek counsel from a professional
For some couples, working through
the barriers to their sexual intimacy can
be stressful and overwhelming. Don’t be
afraid to seek professional help. You may
feel uncomfortable with the idea of talking
about these private matters with outsiders.
But know that there are expert counselors
highly skilled in engaging you and your
partner in a discussion about these sensitive
issues, in addition to physicians who
specialize in restoring sexual function.
You’re not alone
Th ere’s no need to suff er in silence.
Many couples must navigate intimacy
issues in the face of prostate cancer,
and there are a number of resources
available to help make that easier.
To access resources off ered by Us TOO
International Prostate Cancer Education
and Support Network, visit ustoo.org.
Th ere are pages on Sexual Health and
Intimacy (at www.ustoo.org/intimacy)
and Incontinence (at www.ustoo.
org/incontinence) and a Prostate Cancer
Pathways page (at www.ustoo.org/prostate_
cancer_pathways) that contain
information about educational events on
this topic and others that are helpful for
couples dealing with prostate cancer.
Courtesy BPT
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/ustoo.org
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