us, and the people who shared those events with
us. These, put together, become the foundations
of our life story.
Memories are also not static. Rather, they
are dynamic, continually changing. Memories
may become stronger or weaker as time goes
by. What we remember and how we remember
depends on where we are when specific memories
are retrieved. Research shows that we tend
to have more memories from adolescence and
early adulthood than from any other period of
our lives.
I love listening to Barbra Streisand singing
The Way We Were, a song released in 1973. The
lyrics detail reminiscing about a past relationships
with a beloved:
“Memories, light the corners of my mind,
misty water-colored memories, of the way
we were...”
The recollection of past memories prompts
existential questions:
“Can it be that it was all so simple then?
Or has time re-written every line?
If we had the chance to do it all again, tell
me: would we? Could we?”
In your own life, when you embark upon
the path of nostalgia: what memories of the
way you were light the corners of your mind?
Were things really simpler then, or did time
polish some memories, pushing what’s too
painful to remember into oblivion? Looking
back retrospectively, if you had the chance to
do it all over again – would you? Could you?
Nostalgia can be evoked by any stimuli: looking
at old photographs, revisiting a place that
holds strong memories, the taste or smell of a
familiar dish, nostalgic-themed music. For me,
songs are a major trigger. Certain songs from the
past (even just the first few notes) elicit vivid
memories and transport me back in time...
“Yesterday” is one of the most popular topics
of nostalgic songs – an insatiable yearning for
what is perceived as youthful bliss. According to
the Guinness World Records, the Beatles 1965
hit “Yesterday” has the most cover versions of
any song ever written. There are thousands of
different versions of this ballad, in which the
singer nostalgically laments for yesterday when
he and his love were together:
“Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far
away...”
Nostalgic memories of a seemingly simpler
past evoke longings:
“Now I long for yesterday.”
Another famous “Yesterday” song is Charles
Aznavour’s “Yesterday When I was Young,” a
song for which he wrote the lyrics and which
he began singing in 1964. The song’s original
French title was “Hier Encore.” Year after year,
our whole family would go to hear our beloved
singer, Charles Aznavour, who passed away in
2018 at the age of 94. In 2016, we went with
family members and friends to Aznavour’s last
performance in the USA, at The Theater at
Madison Square Garden. He was 92 years old,
still captivating, and when he started singing
“Yesterday When I Was Young” – telling the
story of an older man looking back on his youth
– his audience erupted in cheers and thunderous
applause, people literally jumping out of their
seats, overcome by emotion:
“Yesterday, when I was young, the taste of
life was sweet as rain upon my tongue...”
“Yesterday the moon was blue, and every
crazy day brought something new to do...”
Looking back at youth retrospectively elicits
new insights:
“I ran so fast that time and youth at last
ran out,
I never stopped to think what life was all
about...”
Longing for one’s youth is a typical focus of
nostalgic ruminations. All the firsts: first kiss,
first love, first job, first everything... True, at
times nostalgia borders on retrospective idealization,
but it is still nice remembering the olden
days, when we believed that every war would be
the last one, didn’t foresee pandemics or other
wild natural or man-made disasters, and all too
often chose pinkish glasses through which to
see the world...
This perspective is shown in a Russian song
translated to English, “Those Were the Days,”
produced by Paul McCartney of the Beatles,
which deals with – what else? – the reminiscence
of youth:
“Those were the days my friend, we thought
they’d never end, we’d sing and dance forever
and a day...”
The explanation: “For we were young and
sure to have our way.”
The singer confesses (as many older people
do) that, though the body is aging, the youthful
dreams do not necessarily change:
“Oh, my friend, we’re older but no wiser, for
in our hearts the dreams are still the same.”
Can you feel nostalgia for a place you have
never seen? American poet Ted Kooser wrote
a poem “A Town Somewhere,” about a town
he often envisions, a town he created in his
imagination: “It’s a town that I remember in
sweet detail that was never.”
Similarly, the wonderful poet Rainer Maria
Rilke wrote a famous (and oh, so beautiful) love
poem, You Who Never Arrived, to a women he
never met, a beloved who is within him, target
of his longings and of his dreams: “You who
never arrived in my arms, Beloved...”
He knows that his beloved is somewhere out
there, but fate has not brought them together.
Not yet...
One of my favorite songs is Saudade (sometimes
spelled Sodade), sung by the wonderful
Portuguese singer, Cesaria Evora. Try to listen:
even if you don’t understand the lyrics, her deep
and expressive voice will penetrate... Saudade,
a recurring theme in Portuguese and Brazilian
literature, is an untranslatable Portuguese word
which describes sentimental longing. Saudade
can be used to say that you miss someone or
something. It can be a longing for something
that might have never happened. Miguel
Falabella, a Brazilian writer and film director,
describes Saudade as follows:
“Saudade for a brother who lives far off...
For a childhood waterfall... For the flavor of
fruit never to be found again... For a father
who died... For an imaginary friend who never
existed... For a city... For a beloved... For
ourselves, when we see that time does not
spare us...”
Saudade or nostalgia can be pleasurable.
There may be a feeling of contentment associated
with the realization that we have been
fortunate enough to experience relationships,
places, and events which enhanced our lives.
Like in Tom Jones’ song, Try to Remember,
which he wrote for the musical The Fantasticks:
“try to remember the kind of September
when life was slow and oh, so mellow.
Try to remember the kind of September
when grass was green and grain was yellow.”
“Try to remember when life was so tender
when dreams were kept beside your pillow.”
Well, we are deep into winter now. The grass
is not green, and life is not mellow. September
seems far away, and the future is fraught with
uncertainty. While we are waiting for a pandemic
to relent, let’s welcome some pandemic-induced
nostalgic pleasures:
“Deep in December our hearts should
remember and follow...”
My poetic version:
Remember when...?
Have you noticed how often
we say “remember” these days?
How we lead off with “once,”
or “in the old days,”
or “way back when”?
Remember how readily
we once pondered “why not?”
How invincible we felt,
when Time was just a word,
not a stalker closing in?
Remember how naïve we looked,
giddy with young love?
How our eyes met –
like blazing fires,
as if our youth could conquer all?
We once tossed “someday”:
“Someday, we’ll do this.”
“Someday, we’ll do that.”
As if a great many somedays
were awaiting their turn.
I don’t say “someday” anymore,
Or “eventually,” or “in due time.”
Now, I say “still”: “Still working.”
“Still driving.” “Still dancing.”
“Still...”
No, I no longer say “someday.”
I don’t have the confidence I had then.
Today, I say “yes, please,”
I say “now, please.”
Yes. Now. Still. Even so.
~ Nurit Israeli
March 2021 ¢ NORTH SHORE TOWERS COURIER 23