26 MARCH 16, 2017 RIDGEWOOD TIMES WWW.QNS.COM Prescription for Grief Relief “Oh to be a stone! To feel no grief!” The Greek dramatist Euripides wrote these words 400 years before the birth of Christ. Grief is the price of love. When we love someone and they die, we feel the pain of grief. However, there are steps we can take that may ease the stress and hasten our recovery. Here are some tips that can help the bereaved on their journey through grief: Go back to work. If you had a job, return as soon as possible. Work is a healthy distraction from the pain of loss. If you were not in the workplace, fi nd a job. Stay fit. Exercise can help you both physically and emotionally because activity provides an outlet for stress. Enroll in a class. Not only does taking a class provide you with a healthy diversion from grief but it also can supply practical knowledge for improving the quality of your life. Be good to yourself. Do not hesitate to treat yourself to something you truly enjoy. Take some time to write down a list of things that bring you pleasure such as displaying a vase of fresh fl owers, gardening, leisurely reading a newspaper, etc. Then, try to engage in at least one of these activities daily. Volunteer your time. Another eff ective way to get out of the house and provide some grief relief is through volunteering. Local community groups or museums and historic sites always welcome people who can spare some time to support their activities. Talk about your grief with a friend. Expressing and exploring your feelings with a trusted friend is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Talking helps relieve the pressure, brings you perspective, and keeps you in touch with others. Cry when you feel like it. Read practical articles and books about grief. Reading about bereavement is an excellent way to fi nd your way through this diffi cult, uncharted experience. Guide your thinking. According to Laurence G. Boldt, author of Zen Soup: “’ Thoughts,’ as Emerson put it, ‘rule the world’ for the simple reason that thoughts determine feelings and actions. We can think ourselves into happiness or a deep depression. We can think ourselves into health or illness. If we only take care of our thoughts, our feelings and actions will take care of themselves.” Cultivate hope on a daily basis. When the days seem too long, the nights endless and hope a distant memory, rinse your mind and fortify your spirit by refl ecting on words of hope. Though your journey through grief may seem dark, the light of recovery will break through. Most survivors will fi nd solace in these suggestions. But if you feel that your grief is overwhelming your life, ask your family funeral director for the name of a local bereavement counselor who can guide you through resolving your feelings of sadness and loss. Material in this column was excerpted (with permission) from an article authored by Victor M. Parachin, a National Funeral Directors Association grief educator and minister. Courtesy of NYS Funeral Directors Association OBITUARIES +++ DENISE NAPOLITANO died on Friday, March 10, at the age of 60. She was the beloved wife of John P. Napolitano, loving mother of Roseann LaPorta and Alicia Arnone and cherished grandmother of Valentina, Ava, Andrew, John and April. A Mass of Christian Burial was offered on Wednesday, March 15, at St. Margaret Church, Middle Village, followed by entombment at St. John Cemetery Christ the Redeemer Mausoleum, Middle Village, under the direction of Papavero Funeral Home, 72-27 Grand Ave., Maspeth. +++ PAUL C. D’ELIA died on Thursday, March 9, at the age of 85. He was the beloved husband of Madeline D’Elia, loving father of Michael D’Elia and Matthew D’Elia, father-in-law of Diane and Pamela, cherished grandfather of Matthew, Jessica, Savanna and Michael and dear brother of Rose Fontanetta and the late Sarah Buonaguro, Frances Bernardo and Mary Tarantino. He was a U.S. Army veteran who served during the Korean Conflict. A Mass of Christian Burial was offered on Monday, March 13, at St. Mary’s Church, Woodside, followed by interment at Calvary Cemetery, Woodside, under the direction of Papavero Funeral Home, 72-27 Grand Ave., Maspeth. +++ VINCENZA A. ANDRETTA of Ridgewood died on Wednesday, March 8, at the age of 67. A native of Brooklyn, she was the beloved wife of Gary Andretta. Services were off ered at Fresh Pond Crematory, Middle Village, prior to cremation, under the direction of Morton Funeral Home/Ridgewood Chapels, 663 Grandview Ave., Ridgewood. +++ FRANK P. BILA of Ridgewood died on Monday, March 6, at the age of 86. A native of Brooklyn, he was the beloved husband of Joan and dear brother of Paul Bila. A Mass of Christian Burial was off ered at St. Matthias Church, Ridgewood, followed by interment at All Faiths Cemetery, Middle Village, under the direction of Morton Funeral Home/Ridgewood Chapels, 663 Grandview Ave., Ridgewood. +++ THERESA POREMBSKI died on Monday, March 6, at the age of 87. She was the beloved mother of Robert Porembski, Diane M. Porembski and Ronald Porembski, mother-inlaw of Susan, Nigel and Corinne and dearest companion of Wee Archie. A Mass of Christian Burial was off ered on Friday, March 10, at St. Adalbert’s Church, Elmhurst, followed by interment at Calverton National Cemetery, Calverton, NY, under the direction of Papavero Funeral Home, 72-27 Grand Ave., Maspeth. +++ HENRY BENGEL III of Tannersville, PA, formerly of Glendale, died on Thursday, March 9, at his home at the age of 52. He was the beloved husband of Maria (nee Cipri) Bengel, with whom he shared his 30th wedding anniversary in December. A loving husband, father, brother, uncle and friend, Henry adored his family and was the epitome of a family man. He spent countless hours devoting his time in anything that involved his children, from sporting events to just being a warm embrace and everything in between. He was an avid outdoorsman and most recently took up fl y fi shing. He was a retired police officer with NYPD 10th Precinct and a member of Masonic Tadmor Lodge No. 923 in Queens. He served as a former supervisor for Pocono Township and spent 10 years with the Pocono Record. In addition to his wife, Maria, he is survived by son, Richard Bengel and his wife, Nicole Bartoshesky; daughter, Kristine Bengel; sisters: Catherine Scala and her husband, Joseph; Lois (Ponzo) and her husband, Anthony; Susan Silvestri and her husband, Joseph; and Dorothy Bengel. Also, many nieces, nephews and friends. There will be a viewing from 1 to 5 p.m. Saturday, March 11, at the Bolock Funeral Home, 6148 Paradise Valley Road, Cresco. Father Richard Czachor will conduct a blessing service at 2:30 p.m. Saturday at the funeral home. In lieu of flowers, memorial donations in honor of Henry may be made to the Widow’s and Children’s Fund. Donations may be sent to Patrolmen’s Benevolent Association, 125 Broad St., 11th Fl., New York, NY 10004- 2400. This foundation supports the widows and children of fallen police officers.
RT03162017
To see the actual publication please follow the link above