����������������������
�� HOME IMPROVEMENTS
Walk-In Tubs
WALK-IN BATHTUB SALE! SAVE $1,500
FREE!
Savings Include an American
Standard Right Height Toilet
FREE! ($500 Value)
· Backed by American Standard's 140 years
of experience
· Ultra low entry for easy entering & exiting
· Patented Quick Drains© Technology
· Lifetime Warranty on the bath AND
installation, INCLUDING labor backed
by American Standard
· 44 Hydrotherapy jets for an invigorating massage
Limited Time Offer! Call Today!
888-609-0248
Or visit: www.walkintubinfo.com/nypress
�� OBITUARY
TO PLACE AN OBITUARY AD,
call 718-260-2555 or email
classified@schnepsmedia.com
�� COMMERCIAL REAL ESTATE FOR RENT
NOHO DISTRICT
Manufacturing Space for Lease
Ideal for service, industrial.
No retail or office uses.
Only uses permitted under
zoning district M1-5B
636 Broadway 7972 SF,
cellar only
$239,160 annual basis ($30/sqft)
Call: V. Trager 212-254-7701
������������������������������������������������������
������������
�������������� ����������������
����������������������������������
Powerful exhibit ‘Not Another Second’
explores the stories of LGBTQ Elders
New Yorker Paulette lived as a straight, married woman for many years. Now she is happily
married to her partner, Pat.
BY HAZEL SHAHGHOLI
Pat and Paulette are a loving, vibrant couple
who have been together for 5 years and married
for 3. They live together in East Harlem
and met at an event ran by SAGE. They’ve lost 56
years collectively living closeted
The couple are featured in the “Not Another
Second “exhibition alongside 12 other elders,
who, for a variety of reasons, felt forced to live
cis-gender lives—many for decades. Collectively,
these 12 elders have lost 485 years living double
lives or otherwise suppressing their authentic
selves.
The exhibition tells their stories dynamically
through AR technology and is free public and socially
distanced viewings every Tuesday, Thursday
and Saturday from Jan. 19 through March 2021 at
The Watermark, in Brooklyn Heights.
Paul and Paulette emphasized that the key aspect
of the exhibition for them was to create an
intergeneration LGBTQ+ community—a positive
network that has been barely explored.
Indeed, it was this lack of acceptance by her
mother that led to Pat’s only regret in life. While
watching the historic June 1969 Stonewall Protests
on TV, Pat leapt up to grab her coat and join
the fi ght. Her mother blocked the door and said.
“If you go out that door I will murder you. I will
kill you. You will not go there.”
Paulette knew she liked girls since she was
seven. But her journey could be considered more
complicated. She told amNewYork Metro that her
“goal in life was to have children and no husband.”
By the time she was around 17 or 18, Paulette
had two children and, given her competitive nature,
when taunted one day by her grandmother
that no man would want to be with her because
she had the “baggage” of two children—that awful
“damaged goods” scarlet letter—Paulette replied,
“We’ll see.”
Not long after this provocation, Paulette was
PHOTO BY DEAN MOSES
married to a member of the armed services who
could provide her now three children with the
quality of life that they deserved. This act of defi -
ance to her grandmother transformed into a kind
of trade-off that she “deeply regrets, because not
only did I have to suppress myself, I wasn’t even
able to be true to who I am to my children.”
Adding a third dimension, Pat and Paulette are
both deeply religious and attend Baptist churches
that are accepting of LGBTQ+ people. They consider
themselves lucky and acknowledge that the
majority of religious institutions remain intolerant
of LGBTQ+ people.
Pat and Paulette are passionate activists; they
regularly hold workshops on issues such as bullying
within the LGBTQ+ community, on sexuality
and women of color and talks on HIV/AIDs. They
coordinate these events through their Harlem Yes
initiative, which aims to strengthen marginalized
communities. Paulette has also recently created an
organization called the Masculine Identifi ed Lesbians
of Color Collective.
While Pat identifi es as a lesbian woman, Paulette,
as a male-identifying lesbian, feels there are
unique issues that come with this such as being
“not invisible,” more susceptible to misunderstanding
and more likely to be publically persecuted.
Although young people can speak to each other
about their sexuality and gender identity via online
communities, these are often organized into age
ranges, “Not Another Second,”and Pat and Paulette’s
key message is to make the most out of an
inter-generational community. Pat remarked, “If
you’re feeling confused about where you fi t, ask an
elder. There is somebody out there who has been
where you are at—no matter where they are at on
the age spectrum.”
Visit the “Not Another Second” exhibition at
The Watermark, 21 Clark St., Brooklyn Heights for
free every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. Go to
www.notanothersecond.com to reserve your spot.
Schneps Media January 21, 2021 21
/nypress
link
/www.notanothersecond.com
/nypress
/www.notanothersecond.com
link
