
 
		TRIPS OF TERROR 
 Margarita from Guatemala 
 “Crossings: Untold Stories of Undocumented Migrants” — Chapter 7 
 This story is part of a bi-weekly series containing edited chapters of Sharon Hollins’ 2021 book “Crossings: Untold Stories of Undocumented Migrants.”  
 One of ten siblings, Margarita  
 grew up in a tiny  
 one room house in Guatemala. 
  “Luckily, children have  
 imaginations that make up for  
 the lack of toys and other luxuries,” 
  she says.  
 Many of the family would go  
 on to join their parents working  
 in the fi elds, harvesting crops,  
 including Margarita, who enjoyed  
 her time outside of the  
 classroom, for a time.  
 “I only had three years of  
 schooling. As children we were  
 very happy to not have to attend  
 school for any longer than that,”  
 she says. “You don’t realize, until  
 later, that a lack of education  
 can hold you back in life.” 
 Then, Margarita’s life  
 changed.  
 “When I was seventeen, I  
 met a very attractive boy, and  
 soon the inevitable happened,”  
 she remembers. “I became  
 pregnant.”  
 Looking to build a better  
 life for herself and her family,  
 which now included baby Josue,  
 Margarita took a job working  
 in a factory in a nearby city —  
 though that kept her away from  
 her child.  
 Now single and looking to  
 build a family, Margarita met a  
 man at work.  
 “I had been working at the  
 factory for four years when Fernando  
 asked me out. I had already  
 noticed him—he was the  
 cute guy with the big smile and  
 nice manners. He would always  
 smile in my direction and make  
 conversation if we were nearby.  
 It was nice to have a guy who  
 treated  me  with  respect,  and  
 after two years we got married  
 and moved in together.” 
 Things settled down a bit,  
 until one day, after her marriage  
 to Fernando, her new husband  
 had an idea.   
 “I felt so happy with my husband, 
  house and children — until  
 one day Fernando told me  
 that things could be better.” 
 He wanted to move to America. 
   
 “He wanted to go to the  
 United States and fi nd a better  
 paying job than the factory. He  
 asked me to go, but my baby  
 was  only  eleven  months  old,  
 and I didn’t want to risk traveling  
 with a baby or leave her behind. 
  I knew I had to stay,” Margarita  
 says.  
 “I was devastated the day  
 Fernando left me to travel north.  
 I felt completely alone and abandoned  
 as I waved goodbye.”  
 They lived apart for a while,  
 with Fernando constantly urging  
 her to move to the United  
 States — dreaming of a life together. 
   And eventually, Margarita  
 gave in. She left her infant  
 daughter  to  head  north,  joining  
 Fernando. But without her  
 daughter.  
 “It was a sad day in 2008  
 when I kissed my infant daughter  
 goodbye and placed her in  
 the arms of my mother who  
 would take care of her,” she  
 says. 
 Now,  they  were  heading  to  
 the border.  
 “There was another person  
 from my town going on the  
 trip. He was called Ignacio, and  
 although we were traveling together, 
   we  didn’t  really  have  
 much to say to each other. I felt  
 very much alone.” 
 They took the journey with  
 a coyote, who helps would-be  
 Caribbean L 24     ife, OCTOBER 22-28, 2021 
 immigrants get across the border  
 safely without being caught  
 by immigration agents.  
 “I didn’t  trust him. He was  
 covered in tattoos, and the other  
 coyotes in the group looked  
 like bad types who would slit  
 your throat without a second  
 thought.” 
 Eventually, they embarked  
 on  the  long  journey,  crowded  
 in vans and curious about their  
 next step.  
 “We were told to get out in a  
 fi eld and that there would be another  
 driver along soon to drive  
 us further,” Margarita remembers. 
  “We waited and waited in  
 the fi eld, but no one turned up.”  
 After a while of frantic backand 
 forth, involving local farm  
 owners who tried to run the  
 travelers off their property, the  
 group was greeted by a tractor  
 trailer. 
 “I couldn’t believe it. At the  
 back of the tractor trailer was a  
 small space below the ventilation  
 system. It was a little area  
 not designed for human occupation,” 
   she  remembers.  “The  
 air conditioning was running,  
 and this area was freezing like  
 an icebox. We had to sit down  
 on the fl oor near the cooling  
 system in this small space. The  
 door was then closed, and the  
 area went pitch black. A sense  
 of panic swept over me.” 
 Hours went by, with the  
 group struggling to keep warm  
 in their cold, cramped space.  
 Two days later we were still  
 in our hiding place near the  
 air conditioning system of the  
 tractor trailer,” Margarita remembers. 
  “I felt paralyzed both  
 mentally and physically as the  
 painful cold bit into me, and I  
 almost gave up  the will  to  live  
 because I didn’t know if I could  
 endure much more.” 
 Eventually, they were released  
 from their predicament  
 — but not into the promised  
 land. They had to walk.  
 “The next morning we had  
 to walk for half a day and cross  
 a river to where another bus  
 was waiting for us.”  
 “We spent several more days  
 in that bus heading further  
 north. There were a couple of  
 stops where the police entered  
 the bus to check, and the driver  
 was ready with a bribe of 200  
 pesos per person to let us pass.” 
 A series of other buses and  
 various taxi-like services eventually  
 got them to the border.   
 “We were in the desert  
 near a  remote border crossing  
 where we were met by a policeman  
 who started questioning  
 us and searching us for drugs.  
 He appeared to register us and  
 then  let  us  go.  He  told  us  he  
 knew where we were going and  
 wished us luck.”  
 “To cross into the U.S. we  
 had to walk all night with just  
 short breaks. The next day we  
 continued again, walking under  
 the hot sun.”  
 Like  many  would-be  immigrants, 
  Margarita suffered  
 from the terrifying temperatures  
 in the Mexican desert,  
 with freezing nights and burning  
 days.  
 “After fi ve days, my feet were  
 very sore. I tried to break the  
 blisters and then had trouble  
 getting the shoes back onto my  
 swollen feet. I wondered when  
 the nightmare would end.” 
 “We had all fallen asleep on  
 an elevated hill with the desert  
 stretching on for miles around  
 us. I was so dehydrated and exhausted  
 that when I lay down I  
 could feel my strength leave me,  
 and I knew I was dying.“ 
 She powered through,  
 though, when she arose from  
 her situation and ran after the  
 group.  
 “We thought you were dead,”  
 her fellow traveler told her.  
 She wasn’t.  
 She remembers when she  
 reconnected with her husband,  
 but didn’t feel overjoyed, as she  
 thought she would.  
 “I remember when I met  
 him. I felt incredible relief that  
 my trip was fi nally over, but I  
 couldn’t feel any joy,” she says.  
 “When I looked at him I felt he  
 was the embodiment of all the  
 suffering to which I had been  
 subjected.” 
 Eventually, she found work  
 — enough to send money back,  
 and eventually to return herself. 
   
 “I worked in America for a  
 few years and saved money to  
 send  home  to my  family,”  she  
 says. “My husband has stayed  
 in New York because we are  
 trying to pay for our children’s  
 education. I appreciate his  
 work ethic and the money he  
 sends me. I wish he were with  
 me though.” 
   REUTERS