➤ SNIDE LINES, from p.18
precinct.
One of my moms got put into a
boy’s cell, and I was on the other
side with these girls. I remember
there was a trans woman in my cell,
though I wondered where I would
place myself in terms of the girls’
and the boys’ cells. In that moment,
I thought, What if I’mthe wall?
This is about the destruction of
prisons and policing, and the creation
of new ways of relating to
each other. So if I’m the wall, then
I have to turn myself into a window,
to make those divisions not exist. I
have to be a portal, not a solid structure,
because where I place myself in
the binary is the dividing line itself.
In order to do away with this binary
culture, do I have to destroy myself
— or is my existence a window?
Trans and Non-Binary People
Are Living Acts of Resistance
I grew up with some relatively
close connections to people in prison.
My brother spent time in jail. I never
liked the police. I didn’t like when
they were called on my family. Yeah,
neighbors not liking us, domestic
abuse, random shit. I had bad feelings
about the police. All of that, in
some way, contributed to who I am.
I’m so grateful I found this prison
reading group where I was exposed
to the abolitionist framework: building
a new world, getting rid of policing.
But lately I’ve been thinking I
want to use the term abolition less,
because it’s lost its specifi city. I was
reading the mission statement of
Critical Resistance (a national organization
dedicated to ending “prison
industrial complex”) with one
of my friends. Unlike most people I
know, she was like, “That’s scary,
we don’t know what they mean by
‘the world they want to see.’”
Different people have different visions…
Honestly, I think it’s a kind
of privilege to assume we’re all on
the same page. To tie it back to my
trans identity, in order to understand
our path to collective liberation,
you have to start from the self
and work outward. I don’t think
that is the same for everyone.
Self-care and self-knowledge are
revolutionary. I think trans and
non-binary people are living acts
of resistance. But any person, even
a straight, cis, white guy – maybe
he has a disability; maybe he’s
poor – has been harmed somehow.
I think there’s much more to gain
from considering how we treat ourselves,
as a form of resistance, than
creating a hierarchy of oppression.
Here’s a tiny anecdote. Someone I
know is a cis man. He’s bisexual or
gay; he works for a vaginal health
company that makes homeopathy
things. When I’m at the OB-GYN, I
certainly experience dysphoria, but
talking to him about medical issues
of my vagina felt much better than
talking to a woman. It’s the fact that
I’m attracted to men but also identify
as a boy. I don’t know if readers
of Gay City News would be offended,
but I do sometimes identify, believe
it or not, as a gay man.
What would I tell people to do
when they meet someone new? It’s
complicated; an individual, case-bycase
situation. But it’s also simple. It
comes down to respect. Respect for
someone’s right to defi ne who they
are. That outweighs making someone
uncomfortable about identity
as opposed to prioritizing your own
assumptions over someone else’s
assertion of who they are.
In terms of protocol, I think the
best thing when people are being introduced
is to give pronouns in addition
to your name. Don’t assume,
“You’re transgender, so I know your
pronouns,” because someone could
use they/them pronouns but not
want to be identifi ed as trans.
Thankfully, I have a community
where I mostly feel affi rmed. Given
my privilege as a mostly whitepassing,
able-bodied, mixed person
with a U.S. citizenship, I don’t really
need to be pushing an agenda.
But I do owe it to my trans community
to raise consciousness around
what being trans can mean.
At the end of the day, I’m just one
person and sometimes I think I get
a little too mystifi ed with my own
story. It’s not really the cross I want
to die on. But I also have grown to
love telling people who I am. It’s
fun. I just get nervous about containing
it in something that makes
sense – because I don’t think the
way the world works makes sense.
This is about being able to tell the
truth – which is limited by existing
frameworks and language.
Basically, how we consider and
relate to ourselves and “the other”
is up for a change.
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